Post #12 The Heavens Help An Atheist
Some days, most days, really, you just need a break. When I found myself having what felt a bit like what a panic attack would be, I looked out at the sky and saw it was clear, so last night I took out the telescope to stare out at the stars and maybe get a decent picture or two.
As it turned out, the sky was beautiful, and I could see the few constellations I recognize clearly but as the sky great even darker and stars even brighter and unsettling feeling came over me. In darkness, thoughts turn the same color, and this was a dark sky.
I tried to concentrate on the work at hand. For months, I have a goal, of using my DSLR camera and telescope to capture a nebula, those gorgeous red and blue gas clouds that form magnificent shapes light years away from us. So last night, using my map of the sky and what skill I have to triangulate the stars, I methodically napped picture after picture with long exposures, methodically shifting the camera that was affixed to the end of the telescope north and south, east and west. Most of the shots looked like this:
That's nice, a bit out of focus, but not what I have been hoping for. Then, about an hour into it, I felt for sure I was aiming at the right place, but, no more of the same, until I checked after a 30-second exposure and gave out a small shout:
Ahab would have patted me on the back. I won't ruin the story by saying how out-of-focus it was, so I'll leave it at that; that in middle of personal crisis, sometimes the smallest thing can lift the spirit. Even if only for a short time, and even if it's really meaningless in the face of such widespread suffering; it's worth every precious second.
As it turned out, the sky was beautiful, and I could see the few constellations I recognize clearly but as the sky great even darker and stars even brighter and unsettling feeling came over me. In darkness, thoughts turn the same color, and this was a dark sky.
I tried to concentrate on the work at hand. For months, I have a goal, of using my DSLR camera and telescope to capture a nebula, those gorgeous red and blue gas clouds that form magnificent shapes light years away from us. So last night, using my map of the sky and what skill I have to triangulate the stars, I methodically napped picture after picture with long exposures, methodically shifting the camera that was affixed to the end of the telescope north and south, east and west. Most of the shots looked like this:
That's nice, a bit out of focus, but not what I have been hoping for. Then, about an hour into it, I felt for sure I was aiming at the right place, but, no more of the same, until I checked after a 30-second exposure and gave out a small shout:
Ahab would have patted me on the back. I won't ruin the story by saying how out-of-focus it was, so I'll leave it at that; that in middle of personal crisis, sometimes the smallest thing can lift the spirit. Even if only for a short time, and even if it's really meaningless in the face of such widespread suffering; it's worth every precious second.
Comments
Post a Comment